I found these thoughtful and encouraging:
A Spirited Rider, on helping little girls get a grip on emotional stability
Faith, Dads, and Children, on raising faithful kids
8/31/2010
8/30/2010
7/16/2010
Musing
Yesterday, Carolyn woke up on the wrong side of the crib and was quite the fussy, clingy, needy girl for a couple hours. She spent a good bit of time with her arms wrapped tightly about my neck, head on my shoulder.
Now, of course I don't want my daughter to be fussy or sad or sick or hurt or otherwise unhappy. But, when she is, I can't help finding the abundance of lingering hugs very sweet indeed.
And it made me think. . .
Of course God doesn't want his children to be tried and tempted in various unpleasant manners. But, perhaps, he sees the abundance of our prayers during those times the way I see Carolyn's attachment to me.
Now, of course I don't want my daughter to be fussy or sad or sick or hurt or otherwise unhappy. But, when she is, I can't help finding the abundance of lingering hugs very sweet indeed.
And it made me think. . .
Of course God doesn't want his children to be tried and tempted in various unpleasant manners. But, perhaps, he sees the abundance of our prayers during those times the way I see Carolyn's attachment to me.
6/13/2010
Six Years
Six years ago today, Kevin and I woke up to realize that we had already missed our requested shuttle time to the airport. A quick call to the hotel desk and a scramble to get ready, and we arrived at the airport to hear our names being called for final boarding to our Hawaii honeymoon. We raced to our gate and, in front of the stares of the many on-time passengers, squeezed into the final two seats, several rows apart.
It was not, perhaps, the most auspicious start to Day 1 of our new life.
This weekend, we went camping. Kevin went in extra early on Friday so that he could come home early and we could get on the road a bit before rush hour. But I wasn't feeling great Friday morning, and I wasn't ready to leave by the afternoon. So we left at the peak of rush hour. We forgot the camera. And the child-carrier. Traffic was horrible. For only the third time in my life, I was car-sick and we had to pull over twice. . .once a little late. Half-way, after over an hour in what should have been a roughly one-hour drive, we realized we'd barely make it to our campground before dark and decided we should stop for dinner.
We arrived at dusk and found an empty site right in the middle of the row of 20 close-spaced tent sites. Carolyn was ecstatic to have (almost) free run of the surrounding area, and we set up camp without further incident. We didn't realize we'd left the camp pillows in the car until we were all settled in for the night, and Kevin didn't want to risk waking Carolyn (who slept like she was born for camping, thankfully) to get them. So Kevin didn't sleep well at all.
The next morning, Carolyn and I discovered the gnats were so plentiful that we took refuge in the car to eat our yogurt. We packed up camp amid swatting the nuisances away from our faces and picking them out of our eyes, not managing to leave the campground until after 10am.
There was an accident on a bridge as we neared our planned hiking destination, and traffic was at a standstill for quite some time. When we got there, we discovered they didn't allow picnic fires--and we were still carrying around the raw meat we had intended to grill the night before. So we drove back into the bridge traffic to a nearby campground to have lunch, only to be frustrated there as well. One more stop to get more ice for the cooler, and we returned to a cold lunch at Harper's Ferry.
Only, by the time we finished lunch, I was hot and exhausted. We opted to forego hiking altogether and mill about the tourist town for a bit. We left just as it started pouring rain. Not ready for setting up camp and cooking dinner in a downpour, we headed home, stopping at a state park to belatedly grill our camp dinner. We scrambled for the pavilion and started a fire just in time for a brief storm that damped--but didn't quench--our fire.
We grilled dinner in-between storms, while Carolyn covered herself in mud from head to toe. Another cold rain and strong wind kicked up before we could get her cleaned up, and we completed a half-hearted cleaning in the front seat of the car. Thankfully, the drive home was without further incident.
Life is sometimes like that, and it's good to have a traveling companion who helps you cope cheerfully. Among the many frustrations, there are always silver linings: Carolyn's joy at running free in the great outdoors, a beautiful country, time with my two favorite people, our first big mud puddle. I'd hate to be so wrapped up in misery that I miss those moments.
Someone asked recently if Kevin and I didn't bicker some over all the remodeling--or, rather, if I didn't get impatient wanting things done more quickly than he sometimes does them. In fact, we were warned at the beginning of this project that remodeling could take a toll on a marriage. I think I smiled before being enjoined to seriousness. As our friend said, Kevin is at work all day and comes home ready to unwind. It is easy for me, at home in the remodeling chaos, to welcome him home with a to-do list. But I have purposed to take the warning to heart and to remember, in all circumstances, that my husband is more important to me than any task or situation, be it a finished closet or an smoothly-orchestrated get-away.
If unexpected difficulties and delays are going to crop up (and, of course, they are), I am glad I get to face them at the side of this man. Kevin is the calm and steady anchor to my sometimes well-tossed raft, and I am so thankful for these six years of blessed marriage.
It was not, perhaps, the most auspicious start to Day 1 of our new life.
This weekend, we went camping. Kevin went in extra early on Friday so that he could come home early and we could get on the road a bit before rush hour. But I wasn't feeling great Friday morning, and I wasn't ready to leave by the afternoon. So we left at the peak of rush hour. We forgot the camera. And the child-carrier. Traffic was horrible. For only the third time in my life, I was car-sick and we had to pull over twice. . .once a little late. Half-way, after over an hour in what should have been a roughly one-hour drive, we realized we'd barely make it to our campground before dark and decided we should stop for dinner.
We arrived at dusk and found an empty site right in the middle of the row of 20 close-spaced tent sites. Carolyn was ecstatic to have (almost) free run of the surrounding area, and we set up camp without further incident. We didn't realize we'd left the camp pillows in the car until we were all settled in for the night, and Kevin didn't want to risk waking Carolyn (who slept like she was born for camping, thankfully) to get them. So Kevin didn't sleep well at all.
The next morning, Carolyn and I discovered the gnats were so plentiful that we took refuge in the car to eat our yogurt. We packed up camp amid swatting the nuisances away from our faces and picking them out of our eyes, not managing to leave the campground until after 10am.
There was an accident on a bridge as we neared our planned hiking destination, and traffic was at a standstill for quite some time. When we got there, we discovered they didn't allow picnic fires--and we were still carrying around the raw meat we had intended to grill the night before. So we drove back into the bridge traffic to a nearby campground to have lunch, only to be frustrated there as well. One more stop to get more ice for the cooler, and we returned to a cold lunch at Harper's Ferry.
Only, by the time we finished lunch, I was hot and exhausted. We opted to forego hiking altogether and mill about the tourist town for a bit. We left just as it started pouring rain. Not ready for setting up camp and cooking dinner in a downpour, we headed home, stopping at a state park to belatedly grill our camp dinner. We scrambled for the pavilion and started a fire just in time for a brief storm that damped--but didn't quench--our fire.
We grilled dinner in-between storms, while Carolyn covered herself in mud from head to toe. Another cold rain and strong wind kicked up before we could get her cleaned up, and we completed a half-hearted cleaning in the front seat of the car. Thankfully, the drive home was without further incident.
Life is sometimes like that, and it's good to have a traveling companion who helps you cope cheerfully. Among the many frustrations, there are always silver linings: Carolyn's joy at running free in the great outdoors, a beautiful country, time with my two favorite people, our first big mud puddle. I'd hate to be so wrapped up in misery that I miss those moments.
Someone asked recently if Kevin and I didn't bicker some over all the remodeling--or, rather, if I didn't get impatient wanting things done more quickly than he sometimes does them. In fact, we were warned at the beginning of this project that remodeling could take a toll on a marriage. I think I smiled before being enjoined to seriousness. As our friend said, Kevin is at work all day and comes home ready to unwind. It is easy for me, at home in the remodeling chaos, to welcome him home with a to-do list. But I have purposed to take the warning to heart and to remember, in all circumstances, that my husband is more important to me than any task or situation, be it a finished closet or an smoothly-orchestrated get-away.
If unexpected difficulties and delays are going to crop up (and, of course, they are), I am glad I get to face them at the side of this man. Kevin is the calm and steady anchor to my sometimes well-tossed raft, and I am so thankful for these six years of blessed marriage.
5/24/2010
5/20/2010
Progress 3
In case you don't know, these are what the current stairs look like--steep, narrow, ugly, rising to a spot with no head room to walk, and wasting a whole end of attic space.
The expanded hole in the ceiling:
Stringers, waiting to be mounted. . .
and mounted.
In order to make the new stairs less treacherous than the current ones, the upper part will cross into our bedroom ceiling a bit. I think this is a fair trade-off for the greatly-reduced likelihood of me breaking my neck AND the gaining of attic space for an extra bedroom. In the end, of course, it will be covered in drywall and such.
The expanded hole in the ceiling:
Stringers, waiting to be mounted. . .
and mounted.
In order to make the new stairs less treacherous than the current ones, the upper part will cross into our bedroom ceiling a bit. I think this is a fair trade-off for the greatly-reduced likelihood of me breaking my neck AND the gaining of attic space for an extra bedroom. In the end, of course, it will be covered in drywall and such.
5/15/2010
5/12/2010
Progress
The plastic hallway from the front door to our bedroom, used to contain the dust as debris is carried out.
The new "hallway" where our back-to-back closets once were and where the new attic stairs will soon be.
The gaping hole in the former closets' ceilings, where the stairs will ascend and break the plane of the attic floor. This is exciting.
The new "hallway" where our back-to-back closets once were and where the new attic stairs will soon be.
The gaping hole in the former closets' ceilings, where the stairs will ascend and break the plane of the attic floor. This is exciting.
5/09/2010
Happy Mother's Day
Now that the day is done, I thought I'd share pictures of the corsages I made for our moms this year. I think they are a clever and quite lovely alternative to real flowers.
If you're interested, here are the instructions.
If you're interested, here are the instructions.
5/08/2010
Garden Update
Sunny days and warm temperatures have done wonders for my plants. These pictures are from earlier in the week, so there is even more growth now!
Beans:
Morning Glories:
Strawberries:
First Harvest!
Beans:
Morning Glories:
Strawberries:
First Harvest!
5/05/2010
A Day in the Life
. . .as currently dominated by my stomach.
I wake up. I'm hungry. Knowing that I will soon be sick if I do not eat, I have breakfast--hopefully in time to ward off hunger-nausea, depending on how much I have to do to get Kevin and Carolyn ready for the day. Except, eating only brings on just-eaten-nausea. Sometimes it subsides after a while. Sometimes it is only replaced by hunger-nausea around mid-morning.
A light snack will buy me a few minutes of comfort. Then I'm hungry for lunch, which I eat. . .bringing on more nausea. And so it continues. I'm either nauseous because I'm hungry or nauseous because I've eaten. Does that seem like a Catch-22 to you?
On the bright side, I'm sitting here listening to Carolyn sing sweetly to herself in her crib as she waits for sleep to overtake her. And each glorious minute is worth the entire day of this.
I wake up. I'm hungry. Knowing that I will soon be sick if I do not eat, I have breakfast--hopefully in time to ward off hunger-nausea, depending on how much I have to do to get Kevin and Carolyn ready for the day. Except, eating only brings on just-eaten-nausea. Sometimes it subsides after a while. Sometimes it is only replaced by hunger-nausea around mid-morning.
A light snack will buy me a few minutes of comfort. Then I'm hungry for lunch, which I eat. . .bringing on more nausea. And so it continues. I'm either nauseous because I'm hungry or nauseous because I've eaten. Does that seem like a Catch-22 to you?
On the bright side, I'm sitting here listening to Carolyn sing sweetly to herself in her crib as she waits for sleep to overtake her. And each glorious minute is worth the entire day of this.
4/24/2010
A Vast Improvement
My in-laws have devoted both Saturdays of their visit (as well as a good bit of in-between time) to beautifying our front yard. I'm quite pleased with the result.
It's dark and hard to see, but this is how the front looked when we moved in. . .and how it continued to look until this week. The front beds are established grass and weeds, and the yard (which you can't see at all) is all grass.
New and Improved:
The robins aren't complaining, as you can see. The small front beds are flowers, and my plan is to fill them with a succession of blooming perennials: daffodils, tiger lilies, Gerbera daisies, mums. For now I just have daisies, a few annuals for the summer, and some larkspur seed that I'm hoping will sprout. The back beds have strawberry plants and herbs, and I planted a row of green and wax beans along the back. Next year, I'm hoping to put up a trellis for beans to climb and long window boxes under the big windows for my herbs. Then the front of the beds can be (hopefully!) covered in strawberries!
And I'm back in the tomato game. . .hoping the pots will keep my awful soil fungi away!
It's dark and hard to see, but this is how the front looked when we moved in. . .and how it continued to look until this week. The front beds are established grass and weeds, and the yard (which you can't see at all) is all grass.
New and Improved:
The robins aren't complaining, as you can see. The small front beds are flowers, and my plan is to fill them with a succession of blooming perennials: daffodils, tiger lilies, Gerbera daisies, mums. For now I just have daisies, a few annuals for the summer, and some larkspur seed that I'm hoping will sprout. The back beds have strawberry plants and herbs, and I planted a row of green and wax beans along the back. Next year, I'm hoping to put up a trellis for beans to climb and long window boxes under the big windows for my herbs. Then the front of the beds can be (hopefully!) covered in strawberries!
And I'm back in the tomato game. . .hoping the pots will keep my awful soil fungi away!
4/22/2010
Sleeping Bags
We went to REI last night and looked for new sleeping bags for Kevin and I to backpack with. I was highly entertained by the looks on the employees' faces when I explained we needed the option to include Carolyn either in my sleeping bag or with both of us in a double sleeping bag. . .and that I needed room to grow. Looking at her chart, the first one said (I could say asked, but it was obviously rhetorical) "Car camping." When I said "No, backpacking," her face was truly priceless. The second lady that helped us gave us options and looked up in near-horror when someone commented that I might need a new sleeping bag anyway by the time I no longer needed one big enough for me (pregnant or not) and a young child. "I hope not! They should last 8 or 10 to 12 years!" Because it's unthinkable that anyone could be either pregnant or having a young child for that many years in a row! It was pretty funny.
I will be quick to add a disclaimer, though. I like REI. I have never, ever been in the store without super-helpful and very kind employees. They know their stuff, and they're always glad to help. Things are expensive, to be sure, but they're quality. High quality. And it's a co-op. If you're a member, you get a small dividend on every dollar you spend there. And, though I may have read some shock in their initial reactions last night, both ladies were very helpful and even eventually joked about the space I might need if we were fortunate enough to wind up with twins! We ended up with individual sleeping bags that can zip together to make a double, and I have an optional wedge with mine that can add several inches to its total girth. I'm very, very happy with the variety of options and looking forward to trying them out this summer!
I will be quick to add a disclaimer, though. I like REI. I have never, ever been in the store without super-helpful and very kind employees. They know their stuff, and they're always glad to help. Things are expensive, to be sure, but they're quality. High quality. And it's a co-op. If you're a member, you get a small dividend on every dollar you spend there. And, though I may have read some shock in their initial reactions last night, both ladies were very helpful and even eventually joked about the space I might need if we were fortunate enough to wind up with twins! We ended up with individual sleeping bags that can zip together to make a double, and I have an optional wedge with mine that can add several inches to its total girth. I'm very, very happy with the variety of options and looking forward to trying them out this summer!
3/30/2010
An Easter Post. . .
from someone else.
It's not as if I don't have thoughts to blog about here. It's just that I can't seem to find the time (or at least the synchronized time and motivation) to organize them coherently. I've started a half-dozen draft posts on various thoughts, but they just won't complete themselves. So, for now, some thoughts on Easter traditions.
It's not as if I don't have thoughts to blog about here. It's just that I can't seem to find the time (or at least the synchronized time and motivation) to organize them coherently. I've started a half-dozen draft posts on various thoughts, but they just won't complete themselves. So, for now, some thoughts on Easter traditions.
3/28/2010
Green M&Ms and Thanks-giving
We are indeed expecting a new bundle of joy, and I am intensely thankful for it. My dad says it's the green M&Ms you have to watch out for, so beware! (Shouldn't they put a warning on those?)
Baby should come some time around Thanksgiving, which seems appropriate. I hope to never take the miracle of a baby for granted. As a friend said recently, I want to treat each pregnancy, each baby, as if it were going to be my one and only and appreciate it completely. When one day the realization comes that one really was the last one, I want to have no regrets.
My thoughts repeatedly turn to the women who cannot bear a child and to the children whose parents are absent, and my heart aches for them. It is strange to be so joyful and so aware of grief at the same time. We cannot fully know why God blesses us in different ways or why He allows us to suffer deeply, and the only way I know to respect grief in the midst of joy is to respond with a grateful heart for the blessings I have and to teach my children to do the same.
I cannot begin to understand the ways of God. His thoughts are beyond searching out. Yet this I know: God is good, and He gives good gifts for His glory and our good. Whatever our current blessings are, let's appreciate them to the fullest and give our Lord the glory.
Baby should come some time around Thanksgiving, which seems appropriate. I hope to never take the miracle of a baby for granted. As a friend said recently, I want to treat each pregnancy, each baby, as if it were going to be my one and only and appreciate it completely. When one day the realization comes that one really was the last one, I want to have no regrets.
My thoughts repeatedly turn to the women who cannot bear a child and to the children whose parents are absent, and my heart aches for them. It is strange to be so joyful and so aware of grief at the same time. We cannot fully know why God blesses us in different ways or why He allows us to suffer deeply, and the only way I know to respect grief in the midst of joy is to respond with a grateful heart for the blessings I have and to teach my children to do the same.
I cannot begin to understand the ways of God. His thoughts are beyond searching out. Yet this I know: God is good, and He gives good gifts for His glory and our good. Whatever our current blessings are, let's appreciate them to the fullest and give our Lord the glory.
2/16/2010
A Lesson for Two in Obedience and Forgiveness
Carolyn was not happy that I went downstairs to put a load of laundry in the washer, but I went anyway. Sometimes she fusses the whole time I'm downstairs, sometimes she and I call back and forth to each other playfully, sometimes she amuses herself. This time she must have been feeling a bit vindictive.
It happens occasionally. Kevin or I remind Carolyn that she is not allowed to do something she is about to do, and she responds by immediately going through a series of prohibited activities. But if no one is here to hinder the series, she really only needs one. And the trash can, in front of the basement door, presented itself all too readily.
Unfortunately, the "clean" trash in the top of the can was covered in mostly-dry coffee grounds. So when I returned from my trip below, I found a toddler, a floor, and sundry garbage articles covered in black dust.
Before her name had even completely escaped, I remembered. "If you allow unholy anger to muddy the correction process, you are wrong. You need to ask forgiveness. Your right to discipline your children is tied to what God has called you to do, not your own agenda."* In order to discipline, I could not be angry. I had to be calm. By grace, God caught me just in time. I dusted Carolyn off and calmly took her to her bedroom.
Our discipline procedure ends with prayer for forgiveness, and we hold hands for that. Today, although Carolyn signed "I'm sorry" to me readily, she refused to hold my hands. I could have forced her, of course, but it seems that forcing the prayer that is supposed to close the issue leaves an unrepentant attitude woefully unaddressed. She hugged me over and over, but refused to pray with me. So I kept her on my lap until she was ready. I told her about God's love, about Christ's sacrifice, about sin and repentance and forgiveness. Before long, she reached for both my hands and waited. I prayed, and she cheerfully got down.
I then went to clean up the mess. Carolyn followed me. She would have helped if I had let her, but I didn't want her messy again. So she stood watching and saying, "no, no" over and over. I agreed and reminded her the trashcan was off-limits, thinking that would be the end of it. But she just stood there, "no, no" again and again until I said, "You're right, we don't play in the trash. But you said you were sorry and we prayed and you're forgiven, so we can start over." She gave an emphatic "yeah" and ran off to play, leaving me sweeping coffee grounds.
You could argue that I make too much of these things. Carolyn isn't quite 18 months, after all. But I know she understands so much more than she can say right now. Her physical responses, her expressions, her tone of voice--they are all right for the situation. I know her comprehension is limited. So is mine. "For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known."** She may not comprehend the finer doctrinal points of her sin and guilt, but she is learning the necessary response. And I am enormously, unspeakably grateful for her baby steps. . .and mine.
*Shepherding a Child's Heart, by Tedd Tripp, chapter 4. He goes on later to quote James 1:19-20, "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." and comment "If you correct and discipline your children because God mandates it, then you need not clutter up the task with your anger. Correction is not your showing anger for their offenses; it is rather reminding them that their sinful behavior offends God. It is bringing His censure of sin to these subjects of His realm. He is the King. They must obey." and "If correction orbits around the parent who has been offended, then the focus will be venting anger or, perhaps, taking vengeance. The function is punitive. If, however, correction orbits around God as the one offended, then the focus is restoration. The function is remedial. It is designed to move a child who has disobeyed God back to the path of obedience. It is corrective."
**1 Corinthians 13:12
It happens occasionally. Kevin or I remind Carolyn that she is not allowed to do something she is about to do, and she responds by immediately going through a series of prohibited activities. But if no one is here to hinder the series, she really only needs one. And the trash can, in front of the basement door, presented itself all too readily.
Unfortunately, the "clean" trash in the top of the can was covered in mostly-dry coffee grounds. So when I returned from my trip below, I found a toddler, a floor, and sundry garbage articles covered in black dust.
Before her name had even completely escaped, I remembered. "If you allow unholy anger to muddy the correction process, you are wrong. You need to ask forgiveness. Your right to discipline your children is tied to what God has called you to do, not your own agenda."* In order to discipline, I could not be angry. I had to be calm. By grace, God caught me just in time. I dusted Carolyn off and calmly took her to her bedroom.
Our discipline procedure ends with prayer for forgiveness, and we hold hands for that. Today, although Carolyn signed "I'm sorry" to me readily, she refused to hold my hands. I could have forced her, of course, but it seems that forcing the prayer that is supposed to close the issue leaves an unrepentant attitude woefully unaddressed. She hugged me over and over, but refused to pray with me. So I kept her on my lap until she was ready. I told her about God's love, about Christ's sacrifice, about sin and repentance and forgiveness. Before long, she reached for both my hands and waited. I prayed, and she cheerfully got down.
I then went to clean up the mess. Carolyn followed me. She would have helped if I had let her, but I didn't want her messy again. So she stood watching and saying, "no, no" over and over. I agreed and reminded her the trashcan was off-limits, thinking that would be the end of it. But she just stood there, "no, no" again and again until I said, "You're right, we don't play in the trash. But you said you were sorry and we prayed and you're forgiven, so we can start over." She gave an emphatic "yeah" and ran off to play, leaving me sweeping coffee grounds.
You could argue that I make too much of these things. Carolyn isn't quite 18 months, after all. But I know she understands so much more than she can say right now. Her physical responses, her expressions, her tone of voice--they are all right for the situation. I know her comprehension is limited. So is mine. "For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face; now I know in part, but then I will know fully just as I also have been fully known."** She may not comprehend the finer doctrinal points of her sin and guilt, but she is learning the necessary response. And I am enormously, unspeakably grateful for her baby steps. . .and mine.
*Shepherding a Child's Heart, by Tedd Tripp, chapter 4. He goes on later to quote James 1:19-20, "My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, for man's anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires." and comment "If you correct and discipline your children because God mandates it, then you need not clutter up the task with your anger. Correction is not your showing anger for their offenses; it is rather reminding them that their sinful behavior offends God. It is bringing His censure of sin to these subjects of His realm. He is the King. They must obey." and "If correction orbits around the parent who has been offended, then the focus will be venting anger or, perhaps, taking vengeance. The function is punitive. If, however, correction orbits around God as the one offended, then the focus is restoration. The function is remedial. It is designed to move a child who has disobeyed God back to the path of obedience. It is corrective."
**1 Corinthians 13:12
2/15/2010
Foreshadowing
I can't completely relate to this yet (she has 4 kids to my single), but I get the feeling, and it made me laugh.
2/13/2010
The Icicle of Icicles
It's hard to tell from a picture, but it looked as big around as I am, and those windows it's out-reaching are six feet long, not counting the space between the top of the window and the roof.
On Parental Authority
I've been reading Shepherding a Child's Heart, by Tedd Tripp, and I thought I would share this quote.
As a parent, you have authority because God calls you to be an authority in your child's life. You have the authority to act on behalf of God. As a father or mother, you do not exercise rule over your jurisdiction, but over God's. You act at His command. You discharge a duty that He has given. You may not try to shape the lives of your children as pleases you, but as pleases Him.
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